If there is anything I’m good at, that I can give to the world, it is not just kindness and anything flowery in attempt to justify values anymore.
It is helping people deal with deaths even though it kills me. It is accepting and letting others be even though nothing can be done further on my end. Might be a curse, might be something I’m in a good, convincing position to do. It pains me so much, and I don’t like doing it, but I keep it up.
Do you know why?
Because I want to do it. Because the bullet that stops you from breathing is not always physical. And nothing is more convincing than someone who has tried getting over deaths by also incurring death upon him/ herself, yet still tell you that it is always the ones who get left behind who feel the most pain.
Because a select other “experienced” selves, and I are the only ones who can do it.
I’m glad to have been alive tonight, for the sole reason that those who’ve died won’t bring anymore along with them. I hope I’ll do a good job.